Toddler safety schmafty

There are so many safety concerns these days to keep in mind that I sometimes just get confused, tired, fed-up or pissed-off.

Keeping an eye on a toddler at all times is an unpaid, full-time, 24/7 job that requires more energy than anything else I've ever done.

Yet sometimes, I just don't have the energy to stop the play and give him a lecture about safety.

So, I have been known to let him:

• play with long rope
• watch the 5-year old neighbour play with rope and then copy her ideas, like tying buckets to one end of the rope and the wrapping the rope around a tree to hang up the bucket
• climb onto his stroller without opening the cupholder thingy at the front
• play with the vacuum cleaner cables
• play with loose coins
• play in the bathtub with more than an inch of water in it by himself while I get a drink of water, a towel, the phone, etc.
• cross the street without holding my hand (although I speak incessantly about cars coming and not stopping to admire dog poop in the middle of the street and walking quickly to the sidewalk and not loitering, bladibla)
• climb into the driver's seat of the station wagon from the open trunk
• close the car door all by himself (along with a lecture about never putting fingers in certain locations)

There are probably other things that elude me right now which would likely make me cringe if I were to think about them too long.

But so far, he hasn't required any stiches, casts, or visits to the emerg. Although there was that one incident where daddy slammed the car door on the toddler's thumb....and where daddy and mommy got into a huge, useless fight about whether or not we should go to the emerg, ending with daddy stomping off after mommy insisted we wait and see, and mommy spending a sleepless night worrying about her baby's thumb having to be ambutated....

PS The thumb is fine. He wanted a bandaid on it, and fell asleep with some Montrin in his system.

Ramblings

Lost pants

Stress of the morning:

He's getting ready to go fly his airplane.
He's putting on his uniform.
He's all stressed out.
He can't find the second pair of pants.
Apparently, he saw me wash them.
Weeks ago.
But he can't find them.
They are ripped at some spot and need to be fixed.

What I wonder is why he can't find the pants.
It's not like this is a big house.
Or there is a lot of closet space.
Where do I normally put the washed pants?

So my list of things to do today includes the entry:
-find his pants


* * * * *

No pipi no poops

This is what the little guy says whenever I suggest we
change the diaper
or
go sit on the potty.

No matter if there are yellow streaks of liquid dripping down his leg.
No matter how offensive the odour surrounding him.

It's always:

no pippi no poops

Wall is gone

The wall to the left that is hiding the steps is now gone. The wall behind the white freezer, which will be relocated to someplace else, will be torn out as well.
This will give us a big opening...

Picture below shows the steps, with the wall removed.
The wall alongside the steps, going up to the side door, is not insulated. The little closet beside the steps on the right will be removed and shelving for coats and wet boots will likely go in its spot.

The new approach to sleep in own bed

So far he's slept in his own bed through the night for several nights in a row.

The usual "I want mommy's bed" to fall asleep at night has been getting a little annoying for me. On the days that I'm tired and want to go lie down at the same time as him, the last thing I want is a bouncy, jumpy, twitchy toddler next to me.

But lately I'm abound with energy (I still slump after 4 pm but I seem to get a second wind at 8 pm) so now the new approach seems to be working. So far.

1. By 9 pm (ish) he's bathed, in pjs, teeth brushed, and with Nuggi-Bello.
2. He climbs in mommy's bed and rolls around in anticipation for me to join him.
3. I fold laundry in that room and put it away, keeping the lights dim and the conversation and eye contact to a minimum.
4. I head back to the kitchen after turning the bedroom light off to finish dishes or otherwise putter around. The kitchen is directly off his bedroom and he can see and hear me if he were in his bed as opposed to mine.
5. At some point I mention I'm putting the gate up to his room (he doesn't mind the gate at naptime), and that "mommy will be lonely in here all alone without Benjamin".
6. He comes to the gate and wants into his room.
7. I lift him in.
8. He says "mommy wanna come too?"
9. I say "yes, after the dishes I'll come tuck you in".
10. I keep puttering around and he lies on this bed. If he's really tired he rolls around with a stuffed toy or two, if he's less tired he may take a toy car and play with it on his bed.
11. He falls asleep without me present.
12. If he doesn't, I sometimes go join him for a few minutes to calm him down.

If the above doesn't happen and I get fed up I either

• encourage him to play in his room quietly as it is NIGHT TIME NOW AND TIME TO SLEEP and then to to my own room. This may or may not work. I adjust whatever is necessary.
• or, I go to my own room and slam the door and leave the screeching toddler with daddy if he's home.

Luckily the second option hasn't happened too often.

Does this mean I'll never let him fall asleep with me again? No. I like it when we snuggle together sometimes. There are times when he's just too agitated that he needs his mommy to calm down and fall asleep.

But I'm happy that he's adjusted back to the normal routine so easily. So far. If I can keep it up until he starts school again in September, this will make my life easier. I'll be 8 months pregnant by then and likely more interested in earlier bedtimes anyway, for him and for me.

Yay.

Unfortunate

It is rather unfortunate that there are only 24 hours in a day, and that during some of those hours you have to do things like sleep and eat.

We have the construction bin until Tues. Hubby was on reserve today at his airline and had several less senior guys below him in the schedule. He was hoping that he would not have to go in so he could tear out a little bit more wall on the one side where the furnace is located.

I wish we could tear out all of the other side, including that stupid raised floor. Then we wouldn't have to get another bin later.

This will now not happen. Hubby has to work on Sun to Mon again. Out of town and away over night.

It's not like I can go tear out stuff in my pregnant condition, with a toddler running around.

This sucks.

Especially on the financial front...there is only so much cash we have access to. We are not the Gates for crying out loud.

Or the Spellings.

Blah.

Annoyed

Yes, it's true. I'm annoyed a lot. Seems Chris over in the trenches talks about it as well...she chalks it up to PMS.

Well, I don't have PMS, I'm 6 months pregnant. And as hubby, as much as I hate to admit it, mentioned correctly yesterday, I seem to rarely be completely happy. Something always annoys me.

Especially after 4 pm. That notorious time of:


-toddler wake-up time from nap
-toddler cranky-time because of no nap
-dinner hour approaching
-cooking, which means dirty dishes (I like cooking, I hate cleanup)
-that natural slumpy feeling adults get around this time of day
-hubby coming home from somewhere and bringing with him all his clutter
-the general mess of the day's activities looming to be cleaned up

We're also renovating. In the basement, not upstairs, but since a lot of the bulky stuff from downstairs is now upstairs in our not big house, the place feels even more cluttered. And confining. Suffocating.

Did I mention clutter annoys me?
And dust?
Dog hair?
And why does the dog shed so much? Why does he shake at the door? Can he not wait 5 seconds with the shaking until he steps outside?

I have to work on this. I hate being in a bad mood.

Perhaps using nap time to my advantage and getting some of the dinner hour activites prepared will help keep the after 4 pm time slot a little more manageable. I do this sometimes, and everytime I do I intend to do it again tomorrow.

But some days I want to sit on the couch and watch Frasier. Or some soap. Or read. Or sit. Or doze. Or eat.

Better get in the habit before the second kid comes along.

Blah.

PS As I type this, it's early morning and no one is up yet. It's dark and gloomy and rainy. The renos downstairs haven't started yet. It's quiet. I have coffee and peace. I am currently in a VERY good mood.

Toodler library fines

Clearly, my toddler must get his act together.

He has his own library card, knows how to pick out books and videos, stand in line, wait his turn, hand over the card, wait for the items to be scanned without impatient commentary, then carry items home.

So why is it that he can't remember to bring them back on time?

It's not like mommy doesn't write it on the calendar, or keep the nifty little receipt posted on the bulletin board.

Today, he owes over a buck.

A BUCK!

Clearly, we have to have a chat.

Day 2 - Framing has begun

Things are moving along nicely. Framing the wall where the new flat screen TV will go has begun. And hubby is painting a water sealer on the brick where the stone mason will not have to do any patching.

Lollipop

He said, excuuuse me, whined, for 25 minutes straight:

I want lollipop!

In that super-whiny voice that he has mastered recently. With the associated scrunched up face and watery eyes.

Music to my ears, I tell you.

Day 1 - Naked basement

Panels, ceiling, crap from basement...

The raised area next to the dresser is where the old oil tank used to be (before our time). It used to have panels around it, and we used to store our wine there.

This is the middle section that could turn into closet space, or a fire place...the indented area is due to the bay window upstairs. This wall faces the front of the house. Behind the lamp in this picture (on the right) is a storage room. It used to have a door on there. The storage is actually directly underneath our front steps. We have to do something creative with it because it is the only area in the entire basement that has mold (due to water leakage from the steps in the winter time). But it's a big enough place to function as a great storage room for things like fishing gear, camping gear, outdoor seasonal toys, stuff like that. Duct work hanging off the middle of the ceiling is just lovely, isn't it.

This is the side facing the driveway, and the electrical panel with room to spare is on that wall too.


That window faces our other neighbour, and her driveway. The drywall (the back of it) leads to the office/bedroom near the back of the hosue. It has a raised floor which will come out once this side has been done. More ducts hanging everywhere, lovely isn't it.

The junk and closet you see in this picture leads to a space below the steps that lead upstairs. It is useless space. You can't do anything with this space bec the furnace takes up room and can't be blocked in case of maintenance requirements. So, the steps are behind the wall to the left and lead first to the side door (driveway), then to the right upstairs into the hallway. See how the furnace is right next to the freezer there? Right in the middle of the entire basement? Duh. It's moving to someplace against a wall. Along with the ducts, and the white gas line. And that black pole? Is that holding up the kitchen floor? I don't know what it is for.

The rest of the basement isn't photographable bec of the mess. There is a laundryroom with a toilet direclty ahead of the last picture, a spacious, bright office and bedroom combination to the right of it. The water tank in the laundryroom is in the middle of the room as well and if we take it out (to insulate the wall behind it) we may find a new spot for it to give us more room (and hopefully closet space).

Did I mention we need closet space?

Shove it up your ...

If he asks me "where do you want this?" one more time, I'm going to finish the sentence with a not-so-nice word.

Storage tips:

Pamper boxes are GREAT for storing outgrown baby clothes you can't/won't get rid of yet. Or toys. Or board books.

The boxes are great for stacking, easy for carrying because of the nifty handles on the side, and not too heavy for pregnant people to schlep around.

Don't ask me why he wants to keep his old vinyls.

Social lesson

So we're at Chapters the other day, because I wanted a Starbucks tall latte.

Near the kids section there was a big table set up full of Thomas the Tank Engine railroad toys.

Benjamin likes Thomas. It's one of few, branded toys he recognized and even has a shirt-pant set he likes to wear.

Anyway, he quietly starts playing with the trains. He's so relaxed and so gentle with the toys that I can actually venture about a bit and browse some of the book shelves.

After a while, I sit in a chair nearby and watch my toddler play. A girl of about 6 or 7 comes by and starts playing alongside with him, rather aggressively. At one point, Benjamin's train, which by this time is rather long, falls off the table and he sits down on the floor and tries to put it back together before putting it back on the table.

The girl skips over him and generally ignores him.

Ben is intrigued. He watches her with wide eyes and continues about his business.

I turn to my latte and my book and keep half an eye and half an ear on him.

Suddenly, through my peripheral vision, I see her grab one toy out of Ben's hands and start playing with it.

Ben stares at me and almost, but not quite, starts to cry. His huge brown eyes are filled with tears but he's very brave.

He doesn't reach back for the toy or show any aggression whatsoever.

I say very quietly to the girl, who is standing with her back to me about 3 feet away, "did you just take that toy out of his hand"?

She turns, gives me the most vile stare, and throws the toy back at Ben and runs off to find her mom.

All returns to normal.

A little while later a fat woman comes back carrying the same girl. She glances in my general direction, notices the size of the kid at the table, realizes he's only 2, and says loudly enough for the rest of us to hear that "we all have to share toys". Then she marches her fat self off carrying her vile girl with her.

This situation makes me reflect back on the zoo woman who snatched her son's bottle out of his hands. Did the girl at the Chapters take the toy from Ben because that is what her mother does to her? Or is it just because that is how she is, or how she was taught? That aggression gets you what you want?

At Ben's Montessori daycare they teach the children to not take materials away from each other, but to exercise patience and wait until the material has been put back in its original place. The teachers' prime responsibility there is to protect the engrossed child from such aggressive behaviour in order to encourage prime learning and concentration.

At home, we teach and make every effort to set examples in "my turn, your turn" exercises. We ask for help or encourage sharing.

It's not without challenge, but the kind of behaviour that girl at the store demonstrated is what scares me for Ben. Will this be what he will encounter on a regular basis as soon as he joins the 'public' system?

I hope to be able to keep him in the Montessori environment until he's old enough to start school. If not, well, we'll have to cross that bridge when it happens.

Interestingly, after the girl left the store, a mother and her 2 and a half year old boy showed up. The boy wanted to play with Benjamin's train set, and since Ben had managed to put almost all the trains together to form a really long one, I interrupted my relaxation pose and helped Ben share his train with the boy.

The boy wasn't interested in obtaining half of Ben's toys.

He wanted the one that Ben had.

His mother tried to talk to him and reason with him, but the boy started screaming, so she gave up right away.

I tried to show the two kids how to do an exchange, "you play with this one, he plays with that one, we'll take turns", and although Ben wasn't totally on board, he tolerated it, and even handed over his trains. The boy however was very loud, very obnoxious, and absolutely not interested in any sharing. The mother just laughed it off and wandered away....as if the entire ordeal wasn't her concern.

She was clearly frustrated at her boy's inability to listen to reason. She chalked it up to "boys will be boys", and "you know how toddlers are".

Well. My toddler wasn't behaving that way, and I was very proud of him. I told him that he was a good boy for sharing, or trying to share, even though the other kids weren't interested.

I praised him for being brave, not crying, and not making a fuss.

He certainly knows how to make a fuss, but so far he's exhibited that kind of behaviour mostly for our own benefit, in the comforts of our home/neighbourhood/family setting. Rarely in public.

Since it was impossible to do anything with the little boy, or his mother, and since Benjamin had spent more than half an hour playing by himself, I was able to distract him enough to wander over to the book shelf filled with truck books. And fire engine books. And tractor books.

We sat and looked at books for a good 15 minutes, then I had to pee.

That was the end of our day.

And probably a very interesting lesson for Ben, socially speaking.

Monkey's and acrobats

I gave birth to a monkey. The monkey is now 2 years old.






I will be giving birth to an acrobat. She is 6 months pre-birthday old.

Give it back!

I remember a situation I witnessed at the zoo that has me be more alert to similar situations at home.

There was a woman talking with another adult. While she was talking she wanted to take her about 8 year old son's bottle to take a swig.

I couldn't tell if the drink was the woman's bottle, or if it was the boy's bottle.

However, she asked him once to give it to her and he said no. She then continued talking with the other adult and simply used her size and force to tear the bottle out of the boy's hands.

The boy wasn't impressed, and shortly after that we moved on, so I don't know what happened next. I have a feeling the boy just gave up since it was obvious that he couldn't win this fight against a bigger and stronger person.

What made me think about this is how often I find myself in a similar situation with my toddler.

A toddler finds adult things very enticing (my glass with straw in it, scissors, small tools, felt pens, etc). Often, he may reach for it and proceed to play with it, and then I have to come up with a way to get the item back, particularly if it's a dangerous item for a toddler to have.

I could do what the woman did and just snatch it out of Benjamin's hands.
Or yell.
Or give a long-winded explanation that likely would just go over his head anyway.

But everytime this happens, I have a fleeting moment where I think of the woman at the zoo.

Kids copy adults, particularly adults whom they love and trust.

What are the odds that her 8 year old does the same thing his mother demonstrated to another child at school or the playground?

I want Benjamin to know the difference between what's mommy's or daddy's and what's not. Or what mommy and daddy consider safe to share with him. I also want him to understand about sharing, and "your turn, my turn".

It's not that hard, but it takes time and diligence to not use force and size to retrieve an item back from chubby hands.

I give short reasons like "no, this is mommy's drink", offer him another item "this is Ben's cup".
Or, "put mommy's drink on this table, thank you".
Or, "you can drink from mommy's straw if I hold it".

Sometimes I get close to taking the item away from him, particularly if it's scissors or a knife. But I never take it without a comment to him directly.

Even dangerous objects can be replaced with "Ben's scissors" or "here's a plastic knife", or, "where is your tool box, this is mommy's screwdriver".

But so far it has worked. He's accepted, sometimes with protest, which is ok, that certain items he simply can't have.

I hope to keep this in mind as he grows.

PS I have tolerated protests in various forms and volume, including temper tantrums. That's inevitable. How I deal with these is another post.

Futon be gone!

Our contractor/friend called. His wife's nephew is moving here from somewhere and will take our futon.

This will be a BIG load off. The futon is gone! More space in the basement!! And our c/f has a truck...he's taking it to his garage so our basement will be ready quicker for him to start doing work on it on Monday!

It's nice to have good friends.

* * * * *

The little guy is napping today. I'm surprised, we did next to nothing this morning. He seems surprisingly calm for a guy who wants to get exercised twice a day on a regular basis.

I didn't take him swimming, although it was the perfect day for it. SOOOOO HOOOOTTTTT!!

But I'm so tired. The humidity is making us all schlapp.

Schlapp is German for, um, lazy. Or something. Schlapp is a wet washcloth. That's what we all feel like.

Anyway, he kept bugging me to go somewhere in the car. So I loaded up some of the lighter boxes filled with baby clothes and toys, hubby's two guitars, and the hockey bag and some winter gear and took it to the storage.

Benjamin loved helping with the trolley. And lugging the boxes. And hearing his loud voice echo in the maze-like storage building.

We're on our way.

Storage

We have off-site storage.

Contractor starts Monday.

I'm tired.

First reno dilemma, one of many to come

Our contractor/friend/neighbour told us last Thursday that he is available as of Monday for our basement.

All we need to do is clean out the basement.

We started.
We are not finished.
Hubby is working as an airline pilot.
He's being recruited for two new jobs.
We have a toddler.
I am almost 6 months pregnant.
We are on a very tight budget.

Because of our budget, hubby wants to do most of the tearing apart himself. To save on cost. But that can't be done till we finish cleaning out the basement.

We thought we could fit all the stuff in our garage/shed, but we were wrong.

We have to get some sort of temporary storage. Which isn't a problem as there are many local ones nearby.

But it will take time to transport the stuff there. We have a station wagon, not a truck, so that limits what we can bring with us.

It being Sunday today, and as I guessed correctly, hubby not having called our contractor/friend to confirm we won't be ready for tomorrow, he emails me from some destination. Could I please call our friend and tell him that we're not quite ready.

I called.

His wife answered.

Her first question was "how goes the basement cleaning?".

I told her we're not ready for Monday.

She told me they're going away on Thursday for the weekend.

I'm thinking in my head 'great, that will give us the rest of the week to prepare and demolish, get a bin, storage, etc'.

But she suggested that our friend will be ready to start on Tuesday and continue a bit more on Wednesday, before going on their vacation.

My feeling is that she wants to keep him working. Everyone needs a paycheck.

For some reason I couldn't stop her though process. She talked and I listened. Then the call was suddently over.

Maybe I'm a pushover, maybe part of me is hoping we can start on Tuesday. But realistically, that puts a lot of stress on our family life.

I do not need stress.

It's not like I could help out today during hubby's absence. Toddler didn't nap, and although he was in a great mood, I wasn't really able to put a dent into the basement while keeping an eye on him at the same time.

Besides, it was raining on and off, and since the garage is full, and we don't have the storage confirmed yet, where should I have put the stuff?

Better to wait for hubby to come home.

The contractor will probably not mind having a bit of time off. He's just finished a basement last Friday...but I never spoke to him. Didn't even ask if he was home.

Duh.

I feel like she made our decision for us.

Been trying to get ahold of hubby at his destination but all I get is voicemail.

So...he'll have to deal with it when he gets home tomorrow.

Except, I expect delays since there are a lot of thunderstorms in the area, and that always means red alerts at airports, and delays....

Blah.

Note to self: this is only the first challenge I will inevitably encounter on this long and winding road to a new basement.

Too bad I can't drown my sorrows in Riesling.

Environment day

We live in the most western part of Toronto, a burb called Etobicoke. Etobicoke is known as one of the most environmentally-conscious parts of the city, although different areas within the city are more so than others. And it's catching on to the rest of Toronto as well.

Toronto, or the GTA (Greater Toronto Area) as it is known in these parts, consists of many so-called little neighbourhoods. Each neighbourhood used to be a town (I don't know how accurate my historical analysis is, so feel free to correct me if I'm wrong), and a revitalization of town-functions and town-living has occurred in many of these neighbourhoods.

I noticed for example that city people eat more organic, and better food in general, than most people who live in the suburbs. I also notice that city people walk. Suburban people seem to prefer the car, probably most likely because many suburbs in these areas have nothing to walk to. I also notice that when I'm at my most frustrated because of my small house with my lack of
storage or closest space, I inevitably bump into another person living in the neighbourhood who has come across similar problems and overcame their challenges through some creative renovating or rearranging. And in general, we city folks seem to want to live with less, not more.

In my neighbourood, I can honestly say that if I had no car, I could survive quite well. I may not be able to frequent big box stores or malls as often (although they are accessible by transit from where I live), but then I don't frequent them that much anyway. I much prefer the little delis, butchers, mom-and-pop shops anyway, which are all within walking distance from my house.

Having said that, I do NOT in any way discredit my access to the car. In fact, I am often glad I can count my fortune to be able to say at a moment's notice: "let's go here", pack up the toddler and/or dog, and then go there.

But I digress.

While living in Etobicoke, first as renters and then as home owners, we have participated in all environmentally proactive functions that we could. We had a compost bin in our little backyard well before they introduced the green bin, a city composting service where they pick up not only food waste, but also diapers and dog poop! We grew veggies and herbs, we re-use water from the salad spinner to water the plants, and we recycle. Despite of our limited storage capacity in our little home, we have a designated spot for dead batteries which we keep until the community environment days occur during the summer. Then we make the effort to dispose of them in an environmentally effective manner.

This year we took our 2-year old child to our local Environment Day Community Event.

• The child who knows the difference between the garbage in our house, and the compost bin.
• The child who knows the difference between which compost bin the diapers go into (the city one), and which bin the potato peels go into (the one in the backyard).
• The child who points out dog poop on the sidewalk and says "people should pick up dog poop".
• The child who has learned to point at graffity and say "that's not nice".

He got to carry the batteries in a baggie and give them to the guy at the Hazardous Waste Zone.
He watches us deposit several bags and boxes of stuff we no longer use to the Goodwill Truck.
He helped us exchange the broken compost and recycling bins with new ones.
He helped us carry empty paint cans to the Hazardous Waste Zone.
He carried a remote while I carried the old VCR to the Electronics Section.

This Environment Day in our area was the most visited, best organized one I have seen since living in the area.

This makes me happy.

And encourages me to continue recycling and composting.

Less is more!

Renovation project

Oy.

That's all I can say right now about that topic.

BUT, the baby is due in the fall, and it's mid summer, so if not now, when?

Oy.

Auntie Ingrid

Well, Auntie Ing came for a visit. We sat outside on the steps and waited for her to come. We had a spray bottle and some bubbles to keep ourselves amused as we waited for her Subaru to drive down the street and into our driveway.

She finally came. She was a little late. But she arrived with a surprise.

A glass bowl with two guppy fish in it.

Benjamin's first pet(s).

Unfortunately this morning, I noticed one of them floating. Not sure if my little guy will notice that there's only one fish left. Or even ask.

Not sure what killed it either. Might be the fact that Ben dumped a rather large amount of food into the bowl last night after we demonstrated how to sprinkle a tiny bit in the bowl.

Wonder how long the other fish will live.

* * *

We had a nice visit till daddy came home.

Then the crying started. Auntie Ing, who is hubby's sister, talked about how Uncle John has been dealing (or not dealing) with this recent diagnosis of ALS.

Benjamin was exhausted but unable to go to bed while the visit was going on. He was a little confused about the crying and laughing that seemed to happen with regular occurrance (how can one not laugh when a toddler is around!), and he managed to flood the entire bathroom with water during bathtime.

He finally fell asleep against me, sitting outside on the deck, while the neighbour's fired off fireworks for Canada Day.

* * *

Can't sleep. Been up since 5 am. Trying to research about John's condition. Not much there that I don't already know.

Men, toddlers, routine and households

The purpose of this blog is not really to turn it into a bitch session about certain annoying habits other people exhibit.

But sometimes, when someone within the household does something that extracts annoyance in me, and I wait a day or so to digest and "get over it", I try to see a certain sense of humour in it.

Or at least, it helps me to reflect on things.

It's also funny in some ways when other people, like for example a certain neighbour, shares the almost identical experience with her own household member.

Then I came across this post which further inspires me to jot down some nutty notes about the following situation.

Heck, why not? This blog is my dairy and therefore, in some ways, my outlet, my sanity saver.

So here is what happened:

Mommy's scenario

• Morning. Get up. Change diaper. Serve toddler bottle of milk, then breakfast.
• Allow child to sit on potty, praise when peeing in potty, dress child.
• Get out of house by at the latest 10 am so as to get the daily dose of exercise, mostly for toddler.
• Get back sometime around lunch, offer lunch, and then wind down.
• Start and inisist on quiet time to lead (hopefully) into naptime.
• Enjoy naptime while it lasts. It does not happen every day and is considered precious time.
• Exercise child after naptime in some way or another and make it back for suppertime in time to offer food.
• Since it's summer, let child burn more energy after supper and metamorphose slowly, so as not to evoke temper tantrums, into bathtime and bedtime.
• Bedtime.

Daddy's scenario

Daddy has this annoying habit of HAVING to read the paper during breakfast time. For some reason, certain sections of the paper cannot be read after breakfast. Like, say, during naptime.

He does remember to give child a bottle of milk.
Child will drink milk on couch or bed and then begin to play.
Daddy will pour milk on his cereal, make tea or coffee, and then immerse himself into the newspaper.

By 10 am I'm wondering why
a) child's diaper is dripping/smells/leaving streaks
b) child has not been fed breakfast
c) child is not dressed
d) daddy is nowhere near ready to get out of the house with child to exercise child
e) daddy is annoyed when mommy suggests that diaper needs changing since now his cereal is getting soggy.

By this time, mommy wonders how this delay will affect:
1) lunchtime
2) naptime
3) playtime
4) dinnertime
5) bath/bedtime

Let it be said that daddy is just as much a fan of naptime as mommy is.
Let it also be said that most of the time, daddy is not only willing, but capable of doing mommy's scenario according to the loosely indicated schedule.

Only trouble is that mommy has to turn into some form of a dictator in order to assure the smooth running of the household.

I do not want to be the dictator.

And I do know that if I'm, say, on vacation in the Bahamas by myself for a week, that the child and the daddy will not only manage to survive, they will have fun along the way.

But, for the purpose of mommy's sanity, mommy's scenario just keeps things running smoother than daddy's scenario. Especially because when toddler becomes overtired or over/understimulated, he whines and cries "mommy do it". Thereby leading daddy to (mistakingly) believe that he is now relieved of his duty.

It's not like mommy's scenario is a strict, clock-watching regiment. There is lots of room for flexibility.

If mommy has to pick up the pieces because of a daddy's scenario, the rest of the day is wasted, unpleasant and a pain in the ass.

And mommy gets resentful.

Mommy threatends to hide/burn/throw the newspaper away until naptime. Or cancel the subscription.

I think mommy is entitled to her opinion if only for the fact that she is almost 6 months pregnant.

Thank you.

Fish can swim!

I think my toddler is on his way to becoming a fish!

I've been taking him to the pool since he was 6 months old, but mostly in the summer. Now he's just over two, and it's been about a year since he's been in a pool.

At first we walked in and used the shallow steps. We also walked up and down the ramp but the teenie lifeguard said that we can't do that anymore.

Didn't ask why.

I get irritated when young kids tell me what to do, or not to do, for so-called "safety" reasons. Safety issues have become a topic I shun because I happen to disagree with most, but that's another day's rant.

Yes, I realize they're qualified life guards but walking up the down the ramp with a toddler? What is unsafe about that?

Anyway. I'll rant about it another time.

Then we saw some boys we met at babyclub over a year ago, and they were jumping from the ledge into their mother's arms.

I kept waiting for some young lifeguard to say "can't do that" but they didn't, so I went over to say hi and Ben wanted to copy Aiden and Cooper. (sorry, ranted again)

He jumped and jumped and I was almost glad when the whistle went for everyone to get out and go home. Lugging pregnancy and toddler around is hard work!

But the jumping...it's cool! He dropped his apprehension and trusted me completely to catch him.

No wings.
No life vest.
Water in the eyes.
And up his nose.

No crying. Only "more" and "again"!

We'll see what the rest of the summer brings. I definitely want him to be a swimmer, so it looks like we're on our way.

Gifts and presents galore

It's like every special day throughout the school year (Halloween, Christmas, Valentine's day, Easter) - everyone gives presents to everyone. I'm so not used to this...

Today was Benjamin's last day of daycare. Not only did people bring presents for the teachers, but Ben's cubbyhole was filled with treats and toys and things from his playmates!

I prepared a basket of fresh, Ontario-grown strawberries and a thank-you card for the teachers. But I didn't go out and get gifts for the kids...

I'm astonished. It's like the birthday parties...almost all the kids who turned 2 or 3 in his class throughout the school year had an organized party event for which the classmates were invited to.

I thought this stuff would start happening in grade school.

Guess I was wrong.

* * * * *

The Montessori school where Ben attended this past year did some special things for the kids during their last week.

Yesterday they had a jumping castle.

Today they're having a "funky hair day". We gelled and spritzed his hair into spikes at the kitchen table and loh and behold, he didn't mind!

Now summer if officially here.

Dog days of summer

Fresh ingredient supper

I used some of these...

...and all of these...

...plus some fresh oregano from the garden...

...to end up with this!


Recipe and instructions available here.

Saturday morning ramblings

This morning we woke to the "beep, beep, beep" of a truck going backwards.

We heard it because the window was open to allow the cool night air to flood the house.

Luckily they didn't start till 7 am (on a Saturday!), but daddy was a little peeved and once tot and I got up, he slammed the door. I hate when he does that.

Seems the neighbours are asphalting their driveway on a Saturday...well, it IS free entertainment for the little guy! Show him any truck and he's captivated.

So while he's standing on a little chair gazing out to watch the various equipment doing their thing, I got to drink a cup and a half of coffee in peace.

*****

The toilet training is still going strong. He pees in the potty regularly, and even occasionally on the toilet (at home or at school, albeit only with me present).

The pooping...well. It'll take a while. But he announces when it comes, or when he wants the bum changed.

My new thing now with the poops is this: if it's not sticky and messy but well contained, I carry the diaper to the toilet and we dump it into the toilet in front of Benjamin who then is allowed to flush it away.

Appropriate dialogue accompanies this little event.

Will it help? Will it progress? Only the potty gods know.

But it is summer and he does run around without pants or diapers on in the backyard occasionally. I take the potty out with us, and encourage him to use it when he feels the urge, but he prefers to pee how Rusty does it.

Made pipi in grass like Wusty!

Well, at least he announces it. We'll keep at it.

*****

The plan is to go see a firetruck today.

The Kingsway up on Bloor is having a big Father's Day Sidewalk Sale and they're doing it like a little festival. Apparently a firetruck will be on display, and since the tot got gipped the last time I promised him a viewing of a firetruck, we figured today is as good as any day to come clean on that promise.

He LOVES firetrucks.

It starts at 11, so I hope to be back in time for naptime at 2-ish.

My belly is growing daily it seems, at 5 and a half months pregnant, so a few hours of uninterrupted rest has become a favorite acitivty of late.

Besides, daddy has a midterm to study for.

Should be a nice day. Weather promises to cooperate with sun and heat...summer is FINALLY here!!

Experimenting with cooking and photography

I made two salads yesterday:

Quinoa salad


Potato salad with mustard vinaigrette

Recipes will be posted over at Quick Slow Food.

School picnic

This is what my little two-year old looks like now! He is exactly 27 months old here.

We went to the end of year school picnic on a hot but breeze day, and had pizza and salads, fruit and cupcakes. There were older kids who sang songs in a choir, a puppet show, and the playground was open for business. It was fun!

Tired

Had a lovely night of twitching toddler in bed, and kicking baby in tummy.

Mommy will need a nap later (too much caffein in system now). Feel like shopping. May go do that now.

Or, I may go down to the cool basement and look for the lost bin with the summer dresses in it. WHERE IS IT?? It's a two-bedroom bungalow for god's sake. There isn't much space. WHERE could I have put it? AND WHY isn't it where the other bins are? Could I have mislabeled it with baby gear?

Shopping sounds more fun.

Here's a quick little recipe idea for a hot day.

Summer

It's a new day with prospects of summer, sunny weather, and other happy things.

Despite that some of my own family members think I look "sick" and "horrible", I feel fine and good and healthy.


So today I have a small list of things to accomplish in this nice, summery weather, with tot in tow, and the rest of the day will be spent thinking happy thoughts.

Alone...continued

To be alone is my sincerest wish.

I've been counting the hours, the minutes, until they would all leave.

They're still here.

I'm slowly moving from the simmering to the errupting phase...really have to keep it together till they go away.

Then maybe I'll have a shower. Or a nap.

* * * * *

All day I wondered if he'll remember to pack all the stuff a toddler needs.

Like diapers.
Wipes.
A toy or two. (Relatives don't keep toys at their house.)
Bottle. He likes his milk in a bottle when he's tired.
Sun hat.
Nuggi Bello.
Change of clothes in case these ones get wet. (It's hot today.)
Guitar books for niece.
Photos of Ben for extended family.
Birthday gift and card.

Of course, he asked me to prep the bag since he wanted to take a shower.

I knew he was going to ask me to do that. I figured however that if I didn't do that, maybe it'll take longer to get them

out
of
the
house.

So I did it.

And just in the nick of time the child, who was wearing some shoes of mine, bumped his lip or teeth or mouth or something on the furniture and increased the volume of the whining to maximum.

REALLY had to make a big effort to keep it together.

What toddler needed was a nap.

Maybe he'll nap in the car.

But it's not my problem because

I'm
not
there
to
deal
with
it

Ha.

Food

I'm currently in a food photo taking mood. Check out our salad from last night.

Continued...

And since I'm on a rampage about the clutter:

I never realized just how much time I would be spending in the kitchen once the child grew into an eating (as opposed to nursing) person.

Look, I always did a lot of cooking. We like good, wholesome, homecooked meals, and that means

planning
buying
cooking

food and then the inevitable cleaning up.

But with a small child who is growing like a weed mealtimes are not only important, they are never-ending it seems. Adults can open the fridge and grab something, and rinse the dish out themselves, but toddlers? They need their stuff cut up, placed on little plates, bladibla. After all, you want them to develop decent eating habits, not to mention some manners.

Perhaps a dishwasher would help my situation, perhaps not.

I just get tired sometimes. It seems that no matter what I do all day, each time I go through any part of the house, somthing food-related is bound to cross my path.

So...instead of sitting here bitching about the dishes, I should just go and do them, because in less than two hours the little cutie will want his snack, mommy will need her chocolate fix, and daddy will be starting his treck home for supper.

And since we made unofficial plans with the neighbours to have the kids burn energy together after naptime, I should be proactive NOW and not just do the breakfast and lunch dishes (including putting them away) but also get at least part of the supper prepared, maybe have the salad ready to go....perhaps I could have a casserole ready to shove in the oven...

Ok. Dishes. On my way.

Clutter Schmutter

I have come to the conclusion that a clean and clutter-free house is not going to be a part of my immediate future.

Well, clean maybe, but definitely not clutter-free.

The problem with cleaning, which is inevitable, is that I have to clear the clutter first. And it's not even the toys. There aren't that many toys that need to be picked up.

It's the books. The laptop. The newspapers. The note pads. The loose pieces of paper. The business magazines. The pilot luggage. The clothes. The unfolded blankets on the couch. The dishes. It doesn't seem to end.

But as a stay-at-home mom, I'm destined to either clean up daily or to accept the clutter as inevitable.

I have visions of the basement being finished (we're in the midst of planning a renovation) and having him use the side door and deposit most of his crap in the basement. But we'll see if that happens.

In the meantime, he's out of the house for the day giving me a chance to pick up a few things, and if the toddler naps today, maybe even do some sweeping. Then, hubby leaves for 2 days on some trip and hopefully I can reorganize a few things and maybe maintain what little sanity I have left in me.

Then we can start tackling the basement. Gosh, how

We're having a girl

I suspected it all along.

Now we have the zoomed-in, enlarged proof from the ultrasound.

I am going to be the mother of a daughter...

I have so many questions:

How will I mother a daughter? I'm used to mothering a son.
How will I keep the frilly, pastelly pink stuff from invading my house?
How long will the two siblings be able to room together?
Will we have to move so each can have their own room?
Will she be as easy and easy-going as my little boy?
Will she have better sleeping habits than Benjamin does?

She didn't cooperate fully during the ultrasound. We have to go back to re-do some of the spine shots. But the report so far says all is normal.

What is normal?

I am going to need some time to get used to this news...

Short-term homeschooling

Contrary to what many might believe, not only devoted Christians with multiple children living in rural environments in America's Bible Belt consider homeschooling.

I certainly am none of the above, but have done a lot of reading about homeschooling.

Today, I found an article with a completely fresh perspective about this topic of homeschooling in this blog. It discusses short-term homeschooling.

Who would have thought that was possible?

I know of someone who does part-time homeschooling, not because that's her primary wish, but because she is not left with any other choice. The country where she lives prohibits people from homeschooling their children, and has been known to even throw the parents in jail for keeping their kids at home during the obligatory school days. And no, this is not a middle eastern country, nor a communist one. It is Germany.

To emphasize, I have not considered homeschooling my child(ren) at this time. Partly because I only have one, and he's only 2, and partly because I currently do not believe that I have what it takes to do it full-time. But the above article emphasizes something important to me: if your child learns to hate learning, if your child is hiding in closets to avoid homework, if your child is so extremely emotionally stressed out for social, peer or even abusive reasons, then at least there are options here (in Canada, or the USA for that matter).

The article talks about middle school being the worst part of an American child's educational time spent in the public school system.

Only time will tell how my child(ren) will handle that, or any part, of the public school system here in hogtown.

Not napping. Again.

He's so tired.

He even managed to cuddle with me for a bit on his narrow single bed until he bumped his head against mine.

I now have a headache.

He now is wide awake.

So now I'm going to do what any other normal, pregnant, stay-at-home mom of a toddler would do:

EAT. I have some frozen organic ground beef, some spicy salsa, and some flax whole wheat wraps. Just add cheese...

Frankly, this is not-napping all fine and dandy NOW since I am

a) not sleep deprived
b) have no newborn to tend to

I'm REALLY looking forward to the next phase, when all that insanity will begin.

Especially since it'll also be cold and wintery. We'll all be stuck indoors.

Yay.

I wanna hold your hand

♪ I wanna hold your hand ♪

I didn't know all the words to the Beatles song "I wanna hold your hand" except that sentence.

So when Benjamin wants to walk on elevated structures, he often asks me to "hold my hand".

Sometimes I sing the tune, the little bit I know, and then I enducate him that that's a Beatles' song.

Now, everytime he asks me to hold his hand, he says "mommy sing" and "it's Beatles".

This morning, I looked for the CD at the library (online) and put it on hold when I found it. Turns out, the Beatles are still very popular these days, as I am number 134 on the list. May be a while until I get a hold of that CD.

Which is where YouTube comes in.

Enjoy! I know Ben will!

More on e-post

Maybe I'm losing it. Could be because I haven't "worked" outside the home surrounded by adults in years.

Maybe all this baby-talk/toddler-talk that I thought I was enjoying is making my brain to MUSH.

But after attempting to make my life easier what with all the paper statements and bills coming into this house, and e-post not working as well as I had expected, we (he and I) had a, um, loud discussion.

I may have used a couple of phrases in my uproar that my little toddler now repeats occasionally. Out on the porch for the neighbours to hear.

Not good.

Maybe I should go back to hurling spoons at him (the hubby, not the toddler).

Anyway. I had tried to make the water bill paperless. It wouldn't let me. It wasn't until after our "loud discussion" that I realized I selected the wrong Hydro title of the bill from the pull-down selection.

Duh.

AND, although I did succeed in making one of the bank statements paperless, I read in the agreement fine print that a $2 charge would apply. I figured, since it will make my life easier having one less statement to file (or place on a pile in a room to be filed at some point later in life) I could live with the fee.

Well, hubby had a fit.

"Another two bucks? They already charge us an arm and a leg in fees" etc.

He had a point but I was so pissed off at a) my oversight, b) the fact that he didn't appreciate that this would make my life, and therefore his life by default, easier, and c) that he was right, sort of, that I just lost it.

Like I said, I could have handled it better. Throwing spoons when the little guy wasn't looking or hurling insults when he wasn't in the house, for example.

He ended up picking up the phone and calling the bank, and here's what's getting me even more:

I misread that fine print too! The charge I was referring to was applicable to people who update their bank books at the machine.

I can't even remember the last time I had a bank book, much less update it at a bank machine.

So the chick at the bank told him that there was no additional charge, and the paperless statement remains paperless.

The good news is, I got some of the bills moved to e-post.

The bad news is that Ben now knows certain phrases which I hope he won't repeat at daycare.

Crap.

e-post continued

I succeeded in adding one, single, lonely bill.

What a bunch of crap.

We're co-joint on all the bills, but HE is the primary one, so HE has to answer all these idiotic questions on the forms.

You ever tried to ask mundane questions about bills to a husband who's so not interested in stuff like that?

I'd rather have a root canal.

I did manage to make one of the bank statements paperless. Although they (the bank, not e-post) charge 2 bucks for the service.

So now the only bill I won't be receiving in paper form anymore is Bell Canada.

BFD

e-post

I have decided that I need to eliminate, or at least drastically reduce, the amount of paper that comes into this house.

Ok. The paper is a necessity for some people, and I admit, I like flipping through it when I have a moment to procrastinate. Or rather, take a moment.

But almost every single day the mail person delivers envelopes of statements, most of which say the same thing every time, and most of which I check regularly on the web anyway.

So...why am I typing this post?

Because I'm procrastinating. That's why.

Too many steps to figure out how to go about this.

Although A has an account already.
And I know his sign on and pass word.
But I'd have to go to the pile of papers distributed evenly throughout the livingroom and find pertinent information in order to fill out the online forms that inevitably must be filled out.
Which means I'd have to get up off this chair.

Maybe when I have to pee, which is about every 20 minutes or so, I'll make the effort.

Until then....

blah.

Crappy day

I am almost as worn out as the toddler is.

We have had something to do every single day this week, with visiting and playing and people and kids. So today, with the weather being crappy and rainy, we're taking a down-day.

Toddler's crashed on the couch, and I'm finally uploading some pics to flickr. Just in case the laptop decides to give up its ghost. Wouldn't want to lose those memories.

Daddy left in a huff to go to work.

He's in a huff because I threw a spoon at him.

I threw a spoon at him because I'm pissed off because the plumbing underneath the kitchen sink is busted and has been for months, years, who knows. No matter what we do it keeps leaking all over the kitchen floor. We may have to replace all of the plumbing underneath there, but will he call a plumber? No. He hates dealing with anything house-maintenance related.

Men.

I know nothing about plumbing. I figure since I do all of the house maintenance around here, he could volunteer to take on this one little project. All he has to do is call a reputable plumber or a friend who is plumber-inclined, and get the fucking thing fixed.

If he doesn't do it tomorrow I'm going to call the most expensive plumber I can find and have the entire kitchen sink ripped out and, depending on how hormonal I feel then, replace it not just with new plumbing, but also with a shiny, expensive dishwasher.

Blah.

Teething and co-sleeping

I am coping with this teething situation and the only reason I am is because I allow him to co-sleep with me.

Will teething ever end? He's 26 months old and drooling like a slobbery dog. After the second night of whining and whimpering, I drugged him with Tempra which gave him enough relief that he could at least fall asleep. Whining for three consecutive hours prior to that wasn't fun for him, for me, or for the extended neighbourhood who had to listen to it.

Today is a bit better. I found the Advil, which lasts 4 hours longer than the Tempra, and he's napping at his regular time, as opposed to 10:30 am. Made him walk with me to the store before hand, stopped at ever interesting-looking thing on the 10 min walk up to the store, picked up stones and placed them in his pocket, climbed what was climbable, crossed the street a few times, and allowed him to snack on a few smarties even.

The snuggle time on the couch watching Mighty Machines was nice too, although I was almost asleep before him.

Wiped away drool so many times until I finally just had to dig out a baby bib to place around his neck, which solved that problem temporarily.

Poor baby.

More on poop, and pee

He knows all about poops in the toilet.

But he doesn't poop in the toilet. He doesn't poop in the potty either.

So if the poops are dry enough, I dump them from the diaper into the toilet in front of him and he gets to say goodbye and flush them away. So he KNOWS where the poops are supposed to go.

Now, when we change a poopy diaper, he says "no more poops in diapers".

Waiting anxiously for warmer weather so I can stick the potty outside and have him be at least dry during the day by the end of summer.

He does however pee in the potty at home semi-regularly, and on his own. Meaning, I don't have to ask him to go. All I have to do is get him naked, or at least bare bottomed, and if he has to go, he goes to the potty. He also cleans out the potty himself, by taking the cup thing and pouring it down the toilet, and flushing the pee away.

Sometimes, when I change his diaper prior to dropping him off at his classroom at school, I sit him on the toilet there and he pees.

It is happening....

Dumping liquids

This is becoming a favorite habit.

So I'm running his bathwater, and step out quickly to get a towel. I come back into the bathroom and there is the little dumper, pouring a 900 ml bottle of bath bubbles into two inches of bathwater.

The entire bathtub was pink, slimy, and smelled like bubblegum or something of the sort.

Good thing I buy the cheap stuff at No Frills.

* * *

Yesterday I buy him a new bottle of bubbles. I tighten the lid, and place it on the patio table. I leave to go get something, and when I come back....yes. Half the bottle of bubbles is on the deck.

I managed to salvage the other half.

* * *

What is this fascination with pouring? I'm in the habit now of saving every interesting-looking container for him so he can pour to his heart's content. In the bath, outside when the weather is warm enough, eventually at the pool.

Random this and that

My editor accepted my article. She sent my invoice to accounting. I'm going to get a paycheck for this work. Yay.

I have phone calls to make to people who have been trying to reach me. I'm putting it off because the sun is shining and I have to pick up Benjamin at daycare.

Hubby left for a fishing trip for four days. Benjamin saw the car with canoe and trailer with fishing boat and said "I'm coming" and "I'm sishing too". His lip pushed forward and his eyes filled with tears when daddy and the guys left him behind.

The sun is shining, but it's cool out there. Maybe I will plant some more stuff in my garden. Maybe not.

I must, must, must vaccuum the livingroom. Maybe I'll do it later.

I have been eating consistently since 10 am. I've had breakfast, snack, lunch and snack. It's 10:41 am.

The food I've been eating should not make me fat or induce me with gestational diabetes. I made a Chickpea Salad a few days ago and simply stuffed the leftovers in a greek pita with some torn lettuce. Had four pieces in all.

Sanity Savers when you're extra tired

Here's what works for me when:

*toddler didn't sleep through the night,
*toddler won't nap today,
*it's raining, and
*I have a headache (or any other symptom that reduces my patience level to minimum)

1. Clean something. Specifically vacuum cleaning is recommended, but mopping will work nicely too. The trick is to do something that requires you to keep moving. If you take a breather on the couch, you may never get up again. And with luck, the whiny kid will enjoy "helping" with the broom or duster or vacuum cleaner. You can take turns.

2. Bathe said toddler PRIOR to supper. Put him in trackpants so he won't get the pjs full of doghair and then let him play or watch a video. (Or stick him behind a gate and let him whine it out while the droning of the vacuum cleaner tunes out the whine. Hey, you do what you have to do to make it to bedtime...)

3. If you suspect he will fall asleep significantly earlier than is desireable (you do after all still want him to sleep through the night and not wake up at 3 am) then prep some yoghurt with berries, put some cheerios and raisins in a bowl, slice up an apple, give him some milk, and hope to prolonge the quiet/awake time until at least not too much earlier than the regular bedtime. Leftovers work too. The point is to make sure he does have something in his tummy. Try not to miss that precious window of opportunity where he will go to sleep a tad earlier than usual, like say an hour prior to the regular bedtime (rather than three hours prior).

Note: none of the above is a guarantee that it'll work. I have found that it does most of the time for our situation, but there are days/nights when meltdowns occur and the entire plan goes up shit's creek. Those nights I simply take the cranky toddler to bed with me, even if it's only 7 pm, turn off the light, and get an extra hour or two of well-deserved sleep myself. It'll be up to daddy to move the child from his spot when he arrives from wherever he was.

Mother's Day

I'm not big on any commercialized celebrations. But he grew this plant, and made the paper flower (with help!) at school, for Mother's Day. My little 2-year old...so cute.

Spring in Toronto

Today it feels more like fall. I'm wearing a fleece jacket. Yet yesterday we were feeling heat and humidity. Ben was in diaper and t-shirt. Go figure.

Final Draft

So I finished the final draft. I have just over 1000 words. I sent it on to the guy who will look it over, and hope it comes back with not too many changes. Either way, I'm about two weeks ahead of schedule. We'll see what happens. I'm nervous and excited both at the same time!

Writing from home with a toddler in part-time daycare is interesting at best. Although he does still nap, I can't count on naptime to happen or to remain quiet and without distraction. I also find myself in a slump in mid afternoon so writing during naptime is not something I'm very good at. Maybe doing research or editing, but not really being creative. Mornings are definitely better for me.

So I have to discipline myself to do it while he's in daycare. Which is a bit of a challenge as some of the habits I formed while he is out of the house had to be changed. Like, grocery shopping. Last week I had to shop on a Saturday. Don't like that. Prefer to do it on Thursday or Friday mornings. But the reality is that I have to take advantage of the quiet mornings to write my stuff or to make phone calls, and the groceries will just have to wait.

Luckily I live in an area that has plenty of little stores within walking distance where I can pick up odd items to help us get through the rest of the week. Besides, Ben likes shopping at the delis. May as well make him do it with me and get him walking and tired.

Things are looking up.

Ramblings

Every night I sink into bed with the sombering thought that tomorrow I'll get to the stuff I didn't get to today.

This morning I got to some stuff I didn't think about last night but has accumulated in the back corner of my mind reserved for the never-ending to-do list.

Like washing the outside windows. Well, washing...it was more like take the hose and spray it down and water the front garden while you're at it kind of thing.

* * *

We got a new vacuum cleaner. A Miele S4000 and it has an airtight HEPA filter. The old one was a Beaumark brand without a filter and it was noisy and heavy. Did I mention it didn't have a filter?

The dog hair was/is still driving me mental.

This new toy, my special, little, new, quiet, filtered vaccuum cleaner is sitting in the middle of the livingroom floor beckoning me to start sucking.

Except there is so much clutter and crap everywhere I can't possibly begin. Why bother...it won't to any good anyway.

And with the nice weather we've been having, I have not felt like staying indoors and putting away clutter.

* * *

Right now, I'm staring at a steaming hot cup of coffee and waiting for the tape to finish taping. I want to watch last night's Y&R which is playing today on another channel. It's my one little guilty pleasure. Sit, drink coffee, watch Y&R and relax for a bit. I think I deserve it considering I had a toddler helping me spray the windows (among other things) all morning.

Did I mention he's on his third outfit, and it's only naptime??

Can't wait for the permanent summer weather to stick around so I can dress him in less.

Toddler shoe shopping

Actually, the title is deceiving. Benjamin was fine. He was well behaved and enjoyed trying on two pairs of sandals, with and without socks.

It's the stupid chick with the ladder I would have liked to smack around a bit.

So we're at the end of the aisle, back where the wall is, trying on shoes. I placed Ben's shoes and socks which he wore to the store aside, next to one aisle, and the boxes of sandals we were contemplating buying on the other side.

A lady was halfway down the same aisle browsing the women's shoes.

There were two of those seat things with the mirrors that customers can sit on situated in between the lady browsing and us.

While watching Ben walk around with the one pair of sandals, I see in my peripheral vision a sales woman pushing a ladder on wheels. She's coming up our aisle, but is still beyond the browsing lady.

I figure most people have enough common sense to stay out of the way of a toddler trying on shoes, so I don't give it another thought.

As Ben changes direction and walks off in the perpendicular direction to the aisle we were in, I get bumped from behind.

Yes, you guessed it. The chick with the ladder.

Not only did she bump me ("sorry, I didn't see you there"), but she rode over Ben's socks and shoes. She also barely made it past those seat things that were there for the customers to sit on should they be so inclined.

I just turned aorund and said to her: "can't you go the other way"?

She mumbled something about not seeing us or our stuff there. Apparently, an adult, a toddler, shoes and boxes of sandals are invisible. Not the mention the two seat thingies (what are those called anyway?) she had to maneuver around.

I just packed up and left without the sandals.

Too bad really, since the sandals fit and were a decent price too.

I'm really pissed off.

My problem with the phone

I hate the phone.

I hate making phone calls and I hate receiving phone calls.

Some of that stems from the days when I was a flight attendant and we used to get called day and night to come and work extra flights. There was never enough crew to operate all the flights they scheduled. Or delayed. Or had mechanicals. And flight attendants aren't regulated by Transport Canada the same way pilots are. Crew rest is not something that was necessarily respected. So that phone rang. Incessantly.

Some of my friends who worked with me at that company have developed the same allergy against phones. It's nice to see I'm not the only one.

Then there is the problem of not hearing very well. I feel apprehension when the phone rings and the call display states a number, or name, I don't recognize. What if that person has a bad line, or the connection has static? What if he (it's usually a he) has a quiet voice? What if they speak too fast, or mumble?

None of these problems mattered much up to now. Because of call display I could choose to ignore the phone, which I did most of the time. Unless it was hubby, or my mom. Or someone I knew.

But now, I'm a Freelance Writer Working From Home and I receive business calls on our residential line.

Lordy.

Note to self: change the voicemail message to something more generic.

The anxiety I go through. The dreams/nightmares I have anticipating a bad connection, or misinterpreting important information.

I am a stress case.

Yet today, things are looking up.

First of all, I managed to make contact with actual, real people who returned my calls. I had planned on making phone calls today and although I imitated my toddler's delay tactics (aka procrastination) I forced myself to JUST DO IT while Benjamin was in daycare.

It was then or never.

He even went down for a nap, although not without a fuss, at more or less the planned nap time.

So then I spoke to a nice guy who left me a message over lunch and who even suggested he would send me some text he produced for a pamphlet he designed.

This would be really helpful for me. I can take information from that and incorporate it into my article.

One thing I noticed is that although I had a nice list of questions prepared for the interview, I found that our rather casual conversation didn't flow in the direction I wanted it to.

I have to practice this skill some more.

But all in all, I'm happy with my accomplishment today. I set out to do something, did it, and am now able to contribute to my article some valuable quotes.

I'm excited.